Looking through old pictures the other day to find a picture of Brenda, Patti and I began another step in my morning ritual. After devotion time, study time and blogging, I have managed to wedge in the habit of taking a deep dive into a box of pictures my Aunt Judy gave me recently. As I drink my coffee I reach in, grab a handful and sort through them. The picture fishing is a catch and release process. I toss back those that are uninteresting, include unknown faces and those where my Mother found it necessary to experiment with Toni's home permanents on my hair.
Here is today's catch
Yes, I chose the pictures that I liked; me looking as I remember myself. Clean, coiffed, dressed well or specifically. These photos show the me I want to remember being. Here I am an ice skater, an animal lover, a pretty, pretty princess and a dancer. I love remembering myself this way. And truth told, that is a little of who I was. I loved ice skating. I wanted to be the next Peggy Flemming (ask your grandma). I would put on that pretty red dress my Aunt Judy sewed for me, gloves, earmuffs and blue tights that matched the underneath of my skirt. I did ice skate for a while until my Mother either lost interest or was unable to pay for lessons. But I love feeling like feeling like skating was a big part of my formative years. I did manage to stay in a dance class of some sort most of the time and in the lapses of classes I still danced. When no one was home, I would move all the furniture out of the living room, blast my record player (ask your grandma) and dance until my legs wobbled like Jello.
I still love animals. The evidence of that love is present in our home; dogs, small furry critters and a lizard. But I never was a a "pretty, pretty princess." Believe me, I was dressed the part often but rarely made it through the prescribed event looking like I began. I am not sure what the event was for me to put in a white dress but I can assure you it was no longer white when it was removed. But in my coffee-soaked, morning memories I was the belle of the whatever ball, and left at the end of the evening perfectly intact except for the requisite, left behind shoe.
This morning I feel as though we end up living our lives backwards. Wouldn't it be great to be in full blown adulthood with a complete understanding of who it is we are to be, then go back and live the experiences that would form us into who we should become. Had I known that it is a struggle for me to be perfectly professional and pulled together I would have tried harder at the princess gig as a child. I mean really, at the ripe old age of having memories that require flash backs to explain I should be better at this dressing up - going to work - and looking like I have it all together. I should care less about what my rabbit is doing while I am at work and more about networking with others in my field.
But we are to live life forward, not backward. We are set on a path to gather up life experiences and opportunities as we would seashells at the beach, and carry them with us until we become who it is we become and then sift through our collection to see which could be of use to us. Do you? Do you remember that you have experiences that can help you navigate life today? You do. Reach in - pull them out - dust them off - polish them up.
Dancing, my childhood passion is a big part of my life in ministry...who knew??? I am able to teach a handful of kids n the art of liturgical dance. Maria Tallchief (ask Grandma) I am not, but I love dance, I love music that exults the Lord and I love watching God being glorified through the young people that dance with their whole-heart. Next week is dance camp. I am so glad I have this past skill to share with others.
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| L-R My cousin and friend, Nancy, Patti, Me, Brenda and ???? |
I find myself, daily, pulling a dusty, forgotten skill or a hazy tidbit of information out of my life bag and put them to good use. We are who who we have become and we have become what we have lived. Fortunately I don't have pictures of the times I was hurt, scarred or damaged. Those pictures are in my head but it is nice to have these pretty pictures to imprint in my brain to replace the mental photos so I can only pull out positivity to share with the world.
I know what pictures I pulled out today, but I wonder what fistful of skills and experiences will I find to enhance my day. Will I pull from my dance skills, my sharp dressing skills or my hostess with the mostess skillls, Yes, I have those too. Here I am hosting some buddies, dressing all fly and working the crowd! (Don't lie, you love those plaid pants as much as I did!) Whatever I bring into my day - I am sure it will make my day fun, exciting, at least for those caught in my circle.
What will you pull from you bag of memories today - will it improve your view?
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