Even in Your Head...

Early this morning this photo came across my Facebook newsfeed, shared by others and before I knew it I had shared it as well. The mere act of sharing threw done a cyber gauntlet to myself and my Facebook friends to consider taking this faceless man's challenge; to go twenty hours with out complaint. 

Seems simple, huh? Well, for me, before I made it from my computer to the kitchen for morning coffee I had complained about at least three things...someone left the Keurig empty and I had to wait for water to heat up, the house seemed cold, my foot hurt and uff, don't those people on Facebook that have nothing better to talk about than the President/Westboro Baptist/Common Core/(insert the hot button topic of the day here ). Ouch!

Granted, if you want to loophole it, I had not actually complained. It had all been in my head. Not a word left my mouth. But honestly, a large majority of y personal complaining takes place in my head. It is a pastoral hazard. You really have very few people you can vent to. It is a learned survival skill to complain to the voices in your head.

In taking this challenge seriously I realize the whole point is to exorcise negativity from our personal atmosphere in an effort to allow positivity to flourish. With that ideal in mind it would only make sense that head negativity is a dangerous as voiced negativity to oneself. The effects would be the same. 

We tend to live what we speak into existence. If we speak gloom and doom we will begin to live it. In others word, if we expect the worst we will receive the worst.  Even complainers don't like to be around complainers so a negative attitude can strain relationships. 

But what about keeping it to yourself. My grandma said what all grandmas said, "If you can't say something nice, don't say anything at all." So wouldn't the simple act of keeping it myself be ok? Complaining builds and magnifies as it is repeated whether it is vocalized or not. As we complain we cut a deep root into our soul that allows the negativity to well up in that rut giving us a river of poisonous negativity to spew the next time we feel the need to complain.

Why do we complain - the word is not acting the way we want it to. Period. Since we are engaging in a social experiment I felt that turning to social network might give us the answers. Looking just at my personal Twitter feed, Instagram account and Facebook newsfeed I have compiled the complaining categories:

• "My relationships are not what I want them to be - I am being treated unfairly or badly."
• "I physically don't feel well."
• "Someone I barely (or don't) know has ticked me off."
• "I don't agree with your politics/theology."
• "I am aggravated with those that don't agree with others Politics/theology."

There are several styles of complaining: 

• The "Look out I am taking no prisoners," rant.
• The "I don't usually do this, but I feel it is my need to warn you," PSA.
• The, "I am not really talking about anyone specific, but if the shoe fits," passive aggressive photo sayings. 
• The ever apologetic, "Sorry I am whining about this but..." style.

I am sure we all can find ourselves somewhere in these profiles. (I know I can.) So now that you know why you are complaining or that , yes you are really complaining, even if it is only in your head. Consider this:

"No one can make you feel inferior with out your consent." ~ Eleanor Roosevelt

"No one can tick you off unless you let them." Monica Mowdy

1. Don't play with those that make you angry.

     Seriously, we can't cut ourselves off from the world but we can "unfollow, block or unfriend social media friends that stir up discontent within us. If the one that creates unhappiness for you then minimize your time and remember, their drama is their drama. Their opinion is their opinion It doesn't have to be yours.

2. Truly, if you can't say something nice, don't say anything. Or shoot imaginary daggers within your head at them either.

      I am not advocating a habit of bottling your angst but what I am an am suggesting is that we find a safe place, friend, counselor or laptop and vent. Then be done. Finished. Back away from the baggage.

3. Turn that frown upside down. This is not a "fake it til you make it" suggestion. What I am suggesting is to find something, anything positive in the situation. Really there is something. Even if all you can find is, "I am one minute closer to this situation being over."

So today here I go. No complaining; in my head or other wise. Are you in?

More lessons from Miss Sassafras

I spent the day with Miss Sassafras again today. But today we were minus the parental items. It makes it for more fun for us. No offense - those parent people are doing their jobs; and are quite amazing at it - but then again I am just doing mine. Sometimes the roles conflict. 

We spent the first part of the day at the local swimming pool at the Cumberland Mountain State Park. It was a beautiful day, so why not. I really wanted to teach her a few things. One day I will learn, I know. The second half of the day involved napping and hanging at the house. I was more prepared this time. I didn't prepare! I just let the day unfold. I still learned a few lessons.

Lesson 1. No matter how fun I think something is - other people have their own mind and own timeline for appreciating new things.

I have always been a water bug. I often dream of sprouting gills and living beneath the surface of the water. I can never understand people that are afraid of water, don't like water, can't swim and have no desire to learn. What I really can't wrap my head around is a person that is INDIFFERENT!!! Sassy's mom warned me that her first excursion into a big pool left her non-plussed. With this knowledge in hand, I set out to let her move at her pace with out force. This is not my usual teaching style. As she was allowed to explore she discovered what she liked and as she began to trust the water I introduced her to fun games. She is no longer indifferent! Why can't we give people space to move at their pace and in their way. I look at where teaching has moved to over the last few years. Maybe our kiddos know more stuff but do they learn to learn? Do they learn to love to learn?

Lesson 2. No one looks at you in your chubby girl swim suit if you are with a really cute toddler.

I always worry about how I look at the pool. I avoid walking around. My theory has always been if I am laying down no one can see me. Today I had to move and walk. But I noticed as I waked by no one even gave me a glance. They were too busy looking at Sassy. Why do I worry? No one else did. Not bring constantly concerned with my appearance was quite freeing. I think of a friend who recently shared if her bear depression over her weight. I should have told her what I was thinking; that she is one if the most beautiful people I know and I hadn't really noticed her size. She always looks so beautiful I think I will. 

Lesson 3. Vegetables always taste better if you pick them and eat them right off the vine. 
People have been saying this for years but trust me this face proves it! I need to find ways to enjoy the freshness God brings into our lives and avoid prepackaged life. We may choose the easy, expedient method of operation but it seems that in order to have a life filled with flavor involves effort and patience. Then grabbing and enjoying when the time is right.

Sassafras eating a "tommy toe" right off the vine. She thinks she snuck it! Shhh don't tell her. 

Lesson 4. Old stuff is good stuff.
Sassy loves singing "Let it Go" from Frozen but today she was not impressed when I butchered it. And I did. Too many words. Didn't like the movie. But I can really get into some Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. And we did. We will sing it tomorrow too! Even though I may get into trouble. Hee hee

Twinkle Twinkle has been around for ages and has the same tune as two other childhood staples, ABC Song and Ba Ba Black Sheep. Learning one makes the other two easy. We will get to those later. But Twinkle Twinkle lets us move our hands and bodies in fun ways and learning to alphabetize isn't that the most important thing. A famous Broadway Star may never perform this song, it may not win a Tony or a Grammy but really, anything that keeps you up and singing in bed is a good thing, right? (Note: As much as I enjoyed the song, I am certain I will not be sitting up singing anything past my bed time tonight! Have I mentioned Sassy moves a lot?)

Lesson 5. Teaching should be spontaneous and simple.
When Papa got home they watered plants. They learned that half the fun is getting your hands dirty and then washing them off. And that smelling fruit is fun. So often we adults try too hard to stick to a set plan for learning and teaching and don't leave room for fun to happen. We try to make the lessons so complicated that we miss on important concepts like lemons smell fresh and apples smell sweet. And really, aren't those important lessons, too? I wish we could make time for more experiential learning for all people, old and young. It is really what sticks. 

Miss Sass is returning today. I can't wait to see what the day holds. But one thing is for sure, You can teach an old dog new tricks.

Can you...Let it Go.. Let it Go...Can You?

Let it go....Let it go...Can't hold back anymooooreeee

Elsa singing "Let it Go! from the movie Frozen

Yes this song is already playing in my head as I am headed to pick up Miss Sassafras. (for those of you that need an ear worm today) It is her favorite song to sing these days, although her version sounds more like "dee doh, dee doh" sung with her sassy personality.

I have other reasons for singing this song. Lately I have been letting go of things that hold me back from forward motion. I haven't played my beautiful guitar for over 6 years. I don't have the time but more importantly I don't really have the passion. But I love my guitar. It is beautiful. It is a reminder of endless hours of strumming, singing and the peace that came in those moments. So I have hung on to this guitar with a white knuckled grip just in case....

For me this guitar had become a bit of and idol; something I looked to with pride that comes from possessing something so nice. I also saw my guitar with those "I might really need this someday" eyes. I mean really, what if I give this guitar up and suddenly really "need" to play it? What if I hit a very depressing place or a day fraught with anxiety and I turn to play my guitar and it is gone?

But I let it go....let it go...

I am looking for a few other things to let go of as well. Why?

Because when you let go of something your hands are open to receive. Granted, I want to use the money I will gain from selling my guitar to pay part of my way to a mission trip in Guatemala but more than that.

What if by letting go of this safety net my hands are free to grasp the safety net God offers? What if by letting go of the guitar in my sight my vision is uncluttered to see other possibilities brought into my life? Maybe God is trying to show me something bigger, better. 

What else am I holding onto that blocks my vision, fills my hands, clutters my heart?

What shrines and crutches have we allowed to obstruct our vision? Maybe its not possessions, maybe it is is a habit. Maybe it is something we have convinced ourselves is a necessary part of our lives but is really nothing more that a giant rationalization holding us back?

I realize I am putting a lot of angst on one small beautiful guitar but I had put a lot into the concept of that guitar. Most often it is the small things that trip us up. Small things don't really matter, or do they? There are things that seem so insignificant but even a small grain of sand left in our eye long enough can blind us.

Do it! Today! Let it go! Let go of whatever you are convincing yourself you need to hold on to. You never know how heavy a burden is until you are no longer carrying it.

Undivided Heart

I am not good at being patriotic. I have been emotionally scarred from some horrible examples of patriotic fashion, many of which my Grandmother made me wear. What seemed like a great idea when I got dressed quickly turned into a bad idea in the family pictures.

Of late the beautiful symbols of freedom and unity have become to mean for me, division. When I was little I used to recite The Pledge of Allegiance; one nation under God, indivisible...and all that. I grew up loving that I lived where everyone loved God and loved their country and we were the best! Please keep in mind, my formative years (birth through 14) was the height of the Viet Nam War and no one agreed about that conflict so I am not sure why I got that feeling. It just didn't seem as divided then. Today it seems as if American disagree on all points. There are "camps" all over the place. 

I guess I like knowing we are united in one accord. I truly believe that likemindedness can move us together, powerfully forward. Division seems to scatter us in different directions. (Insert background music United We Stand by the Brotherhood of Man )  I know, I know, YOU really know what is right for our country (or your guy does) and if everyone would listen to YOUR POINT OF VIEW everything would be all good. I get that. Ok. Really...But dragging, bullying or guilting others to follow you against others is polarizing.

Jesus had this movement tactic nailed. He took a group of people rooted in life the way it had been presented to them by leaders that had lost their way. But Jesus didn't come with signature colors, or a popular platform. He didn't come with a slick media package or a pushy shifty campaign manager. He did have one heck of a speech writer though.

Jesus started by giving himself to God in a real way and God was pleased. Long before the masses jumped on his bandwagon he cared for them. He healed people; restored them to family, community, and faith. He fed, he loved. In the midst of caring for people he taught; he taught why we love others - because we first love God. 

I recently read a prayer from my Daily Guide to Prayer that said this, "...give me an undivided heart to revere your name..." There it is! Undivided; an undivided heart. What a prayer. that our heart can be single-minded. 

I will go out on a limb and say that if we could get behind a common thought we could probably become a movement that makes real, lasting change. Some may say that Jesus didn't do too good. Today even his followers can't get along. There are churches threatening to split over differences. Significant time is spent discussing, legislating and litigating actions taken as a statement of belief. Jesus didn't have it wrong - his followers do. Jesus stuck to one plan - undivided heart! Love God - love His created people.

Love doesn't mean we have to always agree and love doesn't mean we have to give in to another's beliefs but it does mean that love for God and mankind comes long before our commitment to our worldly beliefs. 

Can we love with an undivided heart? Can we love even those we disagree with? Could this love propel us forward instead of holding us back. 

Dare ya

Thanks to all the 4th festivities, I am still researching for my sermon for tomorrow. I never do that. (well ...almost never) but it is where I a at today. I have a nice quiet morning to find the last few thing I was hoping God would put in my path; a video clip, a quote form a righteous person a nice story. All those things make for an easier time for the listener.

Mel Gibson in The Patriot

So since I got up I have done my devotional time, eaten some of the best banana bread EVER!, rinsed and prepared some fresh herbs and peppers from the garden for some awesome deviled eggs for later, drank some coffee, drank some more coffee, checked facebook...you get the picture. This morning I lack focus.

I then realized I had glassed over my devotional time to rush to the rest of the day. My daily regimen of books, prescribed prayer time and quiet time had for some reason taken on a rote quality. So what do you do at a time like this?? You start over and do it again but this time you really DO it. And look what I found...

"If we would endeavor, like men of courage, to stand in the battle, we should surely feel the assistance of God from Heaven: For he furnishes us with occasions of striving that we may conquer. If we place our progress only in religion, only in outward observances, our devotion will quickly be at an end." ~ John Wesley

Yep, there it is. Smack right in the face. Right in my favorite book. This book is a favorite because it was given to me by a friend. He had found it at a used book store. I read from it daily along with various other books. This morning the the mindless approach came from doing exactly that. This morning I had reduced my devotional time to a check list; not a deep dive into God time. Not only did I find the quote I was hoping for, I also got a gentle nudge from God in the bargain.

For pastor, worship leaders, anyone involved on the Sunday morning routine lets do this... let's make sure tomorrow is exactly what it is supposed to be - an amazing time with God - not a routine we rush through to be the (insert other church name here) to the Golden Coral.  What would happen if we brought our best; our best that God brought us? What would resonate within the Kingdom if every congregation in the land exploded into spontaneous, exuberant worship incited by YOU! Dare you to find out!

I'll Fly Away...

I always wanted to be one of those people that when I spoke everyone would just stop what they were doing and lean in and listen to some magnificently profound statement. I am about to show my age, but those of you that can remember the "When E.F. Hutton talks, people listen" commercial.

I will just say it because I know it is being thought by many at this point. I would have to stop talking long enough for anyone to stop, turn and pause. Hahaha I get this. It isn't like I haven't been told before. But apparently in my wild rambling the other night at bible study I said something that stuck with someone long enough to message me later and say it meant something to them. (Thank you, by the way!) Looking back it was said in the moment to make a point. It wasn't something I had read, wrote down nor worked up to a point in the class to work in. I was really just trying to help the class to understand how I say Jesus' call on our lives. Wait for it...here it is...

"We don't meet Jesus in the church pew, we meet Jesus in the mission field."

Fair enough, I am no John Wesley, John Calvin or Martin Luther. But I really believe this. I believe others before have preached, written about and taught this very lesson. My friend that messaged me knows better and my words confirmed what she felt God was speaking into her life. Yet it amazes me that I still see other people seeing their faith quest as a check list. 

Met God - check

Invited Jesus into my heart - check

Learned about the holy spirit, gonna let it shine, let it shine, let it shine - check. 

Phew! Now I can move on to my next life quest.

But have we really come into a relationship with Jesus without hanging out with Him? Matthew 25 teaches us that in the end we will be examined for how we served the "other", the lost, the forgotten. Jesus tells us when we do - we did it for him. 

That is where Jesus is! He is hanging out with the lost, the overlooked. Those that need to be found. those that are hiding from his followers and the hurt they have caused. Those that don't even know who he is. So it only makes sense that if we want to hang out with him, meet him, share time doing what he likes to do - we have to go there - to those he is sharing his time with. That is where He will be, not just hanging our in you church building waiting for his followers to make time to show up.

As a pastor, I pray this prayer over the bread and cup in Holy Communion:
"Make them be for us the body and blood of Christ."

So wait Jesus is in the church???
As we hang out in the sanctuary - comfy in our padded pews - Jesus IS right there, right??
Yes he is there with us, in the moment, recreating life within us. Reminding us that his mercies give us life anew as we receive the broken body in the bread and drain the cup of suffering.

Joan Puls in Seek Treasures in Small Fields wrote this, "Draining the cup of suffering is the final test of our sincerity in claiming discipleship. We can expect no right our left hand seat of honor, no prerogatives of power or monopoly on truth, no thrones, no outsiders. But we can have the privilege of holding one another, broken and bruised, in the embrace of our circle, of keeping watch with the dying, or keeping vigil with the condemned, or walking alongside the exiled and weary, of standing at the foot of the cross, not in despair or bitterness, but open to the miracle of pending resurrection. And finally, of waiting hopefully for our own welcome into life. Wholeness at last!"

Now that is profound! 

As the church - we are to be moving - going - serving just resting a moment on the pew to be revived, restored and refueled by the body and blood of Christ. The rest of that communion prayer is this:

"that we may be for the world the body of Christ redeemed by His blood." 

The WHOLE WORLD, we need to be CHRIST. Instead of being a rock - perched atop of Peter, the one on which Christ's church was built, a fortress awaiting attack we should be a vessel thrown by God, flying through the air crashing into the darkness binging light to those trapped there.

Ready to fly with me?

It's All About Wings Not Roots, People

I believe in moving children/people in motion. I believe minds work better, hearts are more alive, we shake loose roots and develop wings when we move. Age and poor choices limit how I can move. I can no longer run (at least not without debilitating pain and a nasty lecture from the orthopedic surgeon trying to save my knees.) I can swim andI do. I can walk and I will sometimes. I find it incredibly boring. But as long as I can remember I was a dancer. I was never great but I had a great love for dancing. 

I am almost this good!

In an effort to encourage some kids to move at my current pastoral appointment I started a liturgical dance team. We started with six willing little girls with no dance experience that planned to do one dance on Easter Sunday to a complete program with soon to be three groups, more teachers and approximately 40 kids. Are we great? The congregation thinks so but I am sure Abby Lee Miller would not agree.

We bring a new aspect to worship; a change in how and where we see God. We have kids ranging in age from three to 17 learning about God in a new and different way. I have seen children moved to tears by listening to music in a new way. The best part is seeing them gain confidence and self-worth in their God-given bodies. I see kids carrying themselves better, more willing to tackle new and challenging tasks and a deeper love for God and each other.

Robert Schnase says in his book, Remember the Future, "Faithful obedience practices with intentionality and movement, the following of Christ becomes more creative, satisfying, effective, and graceful even when it takes us to places we may not want to go."

The same is in all places in life. Moving forward gives us a new outlook, keeps us less rooted in the same old, same old. Gives us fresh air in our nostrils and challenges to our brains and bodies. One of my favorite quotes, "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results,"(who didn't say this) applies to this concept of movement. Movement for the sake of movement is is what my uncle calls "runnin' ingnernt" but moving forward is progress. Just the act of movement awakens our senses to new possibilities. 

In the Book of Acts, chapter eight, we see the story of the burial of the apostle Stephen due to being stoned for spreading the Good News. The passage also includes his brutal death didn't dissuade the the other believers from scattering and sharing that very message. But there is one in the story that is still rooted, Saul. He has yet to become the monumental change agent we know him to be. What made the transition? The willingness to move beyond a pre-conceived mindset, the willingness to move beyond blindness at God's bidding, and desire for the change his life needed, prompted by a meeting with Christ on the road to Damascus.

Where do you have roots but need wings? Is there a place in your life where you could use a new look at the possibilities. Hey, a quick experiment even helped me become the best dance teacher ever.

See here is proof! The ushers found this in the offering late the other day.

Shameless brag but truly, moving into the venture of liturgical dance has opened me/us into so much more!