Be Where it Matters

Recently I was blessed to participate in a wedding of a couple from our church family. Participation for me means I enter into a covenant of guidance, love and commitment before the actual ceremony. I love the pre-wedding stuff! I have to admit, by the time bride and groom are in the church, standing before me, at the altar of God ready to make covenantal vows with God to spend their life in a triangulated relationship with God.

This wedding was not unique by today's standards but definitely not one with a nice standard liturgy in the United Methodist Book of Worship; there were children from a previous marriage and from this relationship that were entering into this covenant as well as to create a new family unit.

Elle as my Associate Pastor

I often wonder why our liturgies of the church haven't begun to wrestle with and embrace the shapes of families today and take on the task of updating our liturgical voice to fit. But this is a post for another day. On this day I want to share my thoughts about this:

This photo has lingered in my head long past the day the couple is to return from their beach bound honeymoon. There is something special about this picture. I am a firm believer that if you want a perfectly, well-choreographed wedding do not ask children to be involved. But if you want a wedding that is a representation of who you are, your loves and your passions, then you may end up with unpredictability. And this wedding wins.

At first glance you may think that this little girl either just really likes me or loves being the focus of attention but let me assure you, neither is true. She is what I love to call a "touch me not." She is unsure around many people other than her immediate family. She is slow to warm up to new people and even after a year she has yet to warm up to me and she retreats if she thinks others are watching. So why did she choose to stand next to me after dumping her bucket of petals in one solid lump at the feet of the bridesmaids? I think the answer is in her posture. I think we may see a hint of what her curly little head is thinking when you look at her placement. Her temperament is mirroring not the celebration as much as it is the seriousness of the moment.

This beautiful three-year-old little cherub is standing at attention; with pride and importance. She is standing as a facilitator for God and her parents. She appears to grasp exactly why we are here.

To compensate for the short-coming of standard liturgy, I often write in vows for the adults as parents in the new family and ask the children to respond. Elle took this time quite earnestly and then walked up and took her place with beside me, both at rehearsal and the ceremony. She stood there, uncharacteristically still sans wiggles and gazed upon her parents as they vowed to love each other and promise to create a family that would be a glory to God. She seemed to want to be where the "action" was happening; the place where God was in the midst of the moment. 


Why wouldn't you rather be where God is in the mix instead of on the side lines standing in uncomfortable shoes waiting to make a dash to the reception? Why wouldn't you want to be up where the "action" is taking place? She had a ring side seat to the formation of a new family in the sight of God!

God was at work at that moment. An unsuspecting bride and groom where standing in God's presence and He blessed this family in this moment! What an amazing process to witness up front and personally. How often are we willing to stand where we have been told or relegate ourselves to the furthest spot from God to because convention dictates? Maybe we need to learn to put ourselves in the midst of God's action. Do we miss the magnitude of a moment by getting lost in the duty of the day? 

Let little Elle teach us to make our way to where God is at work, stand and watch what He does in the moment and be ready for what comes our way!