Mastering Moses...Part Two

The day I found out I was pregnant with my first child, Jill, I was weighed and measured when I was examined. I measured 5'5" and for the purposes of this story you don't need to know how much I weighed. In an interesting turn of events when I was measured at her first birthday I measured a full inch and a quarter taller! The amazing thing is that I did the exact same thing again as I gave birth the second time. In order to reach my Gabby Reece goal (I have always decided that I am not really overweight but I am under tall) I would need to have a total of eight children. I digress... My point is personal growth. I have done enough, right??? Probably not. A seminary professor of mine once said you can tell when a person stops growing by the date of the most current book on their shelf. Although he was referring to clergy I believe the sentiment hold true for others as well. 



Recently I read an article from a web site I subscribe to called, ChurchLeaders. A recent article captured my attention. The article was titled, 5 Things Long-Term Leaders Master (and Quitters Never Do) . Yesterday my post dealt with the fist "thing," being unpopular. The next two concepts needed for long term leaders according to Carey Nieuwhof, the author of the article suggested were "Personal Growth" and "Trusting God More Than Themselves." I find the two go hand in hand. As you trust in God you will grow and as you grow you will be enabled to trust more in God.

I used to know everything. If you had asked me I would have told you. In fact, if you had asked others that knew me, they would have told you I thought I knew everything. It was a while before I learned opinion from knowledge. On some level, we probably all have subjects that we feel we are experts. It was through humble, personal growth that I was able to see that others knew something and most often far more than I really know. Two undergrad degrees, a masters degree and a MDiv later I feel less knowledgable than I did a a middle school girl.

I grew by losing a part of myself and that part of me was shed as I discovered a God that has perfection wrapped up in His plan. The more I saw His map for my life filled with great wisdom designed for me, I found that trusting God made so much more sense that to lean on my own understanding. I had to learn it was God's Wisdom that carried me through, not my own. 

I am still growing daily. For me it is a two steps forward, one step back or most unfortunately it can often be a one step forward, two steps back process. I often get caught up in ability. I am a fairly able and competent person and that is exactly what trips me up. Having the skills to accomplish tasks lets me rely on my own ability all too easily. I have to remind myself I could do so much more if I let God in on the planning and execution of life.

So by losing myself I gain a shot at excellence. 

Mastering Moses...part one

In a never ending quest to be a better writer, I blog. In that same quest I also read...a lot! I read from several books daily as well as read blogs and articles and pay close attention to how others write and craft thoughts into great (and sometimes, not so great) messages.

Recently I read an article from a web site I subscribe to called, ChurchLeaders. A recent article captured my attention. The article was titled, 5 Things Long-Term Leaders Master (and Quitters Never Do) . As someone that has spent the better part of my adulthood in some form  of leadership; sometimes long-term, sometimes not so much, this article spoke to me. I NEVER want to be known as a quitter, for sure. I want to finish what ever I start. When do you know your season is over and when you are walking away; quitting; giving up? Even thought this article was written for church leaders, the five reasons are pertinent to leaders in all walks of life.

In ministry, especially the United Methodsit Church, the thought of long term ministry is almost a foreign term. In a denomination where the average tenure at a local church is 8 years, it is almost impossible to plan to be in ministry long term with a particular church family. It could be easy for me to ignore the chance to grow in the area of being a leader that would prosper in a long term relationship. And if I only stay short-term everywhere I go then these long term lessons will prove to be beneficial in my life's relationships.


The first thing long term leaders master is, "Being Unpopular." Wow! Have I ever been that person. I don't care what anyone says, no one wants people to not like them. In ministry, you tend to popular for what is called the honeymoon. Let me say this beginning period of leadership is awesome! Everything you do - everything you say is right and beautiful. It is almost as if you are Ghandi and Billy Graham rolled into one. For a while you are a brilliant teacher, masterful speaker and you are sharp and quick. It is easy to expect your picture on Time Magazine as Man or Woman of the Year.

Somewhere in the in the midst of your first, second or third year the shine wears off and you are almost dull. Decisions have been made that make some people happy and other decisions are made that make others happy. The article states that as an effective leader you often make decisions that that are what people need instead of what people want. I find that I and faced with guiding people down the path that God is leading me. I feel that as God and I are wrestling with my understanding and fulfilling what He want from me, those I lead feel as though I am trying to please this group or that person. The funny thing that no one is considering is that in pleasing one contingent you have alienated another. There is nothing to be gained by leading to make others happy.

Moses must have had to wrestle too. I can hear the conversation now, "But God, really, they do't want to eat this flaky stuff." They are going to whine. "Don't you remember? Wouldn't it be easier to just sneak back into Egypt and pack a few picnic baskets and load up goat or two and start over?"

The answer lies in how it went down with Aaron when Moses went up to talk to God on the Mountain. The people got antsy and wanted to make a golden calf. In that moment Aaron had a choice as a leader to make; talk the people down from the ledge, guide them in God's way or help them make the golden idol. They made the idol. Aaron helped. Initially people were happy. They were probably ready to nominate him for "Pastor of the Year."

Being popular with those you lead is soooooooo much easier than doing what God calls you to do. God doesn't take us down the easy path. He often takes us through the wilderness so we can let go of the golden calfs in our lives.  A leader that guides others through that wilderness is not popular. Look at how Moses was treated.  I am not sure how I feel about being unpopular. I like it when people like me. My heart is burdened when others don't like me or when I have fallen short of their expectations. I lose sleep, fret and get my feelers hurt. I am human. I have cried, lost sleep, gotten angry. A recent pew survey found that "57% of those would leave ministry if there were another vocation they could do."Citation 

The the ways I find that I cope with this partial and temporary unpopularity is to lean heavily on God. Knowing that His way is perfect even when I am not. I also learn to covet those times when I find approval from others. Although their approval may be fleeting it has a lasting effect. I also have a friend that is not in my congregation, never will be. We are nothing alike and a like in so many ways. I don't see her often but when I do, she loves me. She doesn't count on me for leadership and the only decision we make together is a lunch venue. While our conversations are deep and have a lasting impact, I never feel badly when our time together ends. I am always popular with someone as long as I have her.


Tomorrow...."Personal Growth"  eek

"WE"ird

Here is my weird family yesterday at our family picnic. Well...most of them anyway. There are a few missing. Just like any other family gathering we have some that had other engagements, a few that forgot, one or two that are crowd avoiders and I am sure there were some that "won't come if so-and-so comes", and some that were ill or too old to join us. Other than my two boys, Joe, one daughter, a son-in-law and sassafras I had no "legal" relatives at this family picnic. this family is my church family and truthfully I spend much more time with these folks than I do my daughter in Nashville, my sister back in Oklahoma or my aunt in Atlanta.

The world has changed. We no longer live in villages formed by most of our family. We can't just walk down the road to grandma's house or run next door to our sister's home. I realize that here in the small town I currently live in, there still are a few folks that manage to maintain family land for offspring to come back and settle with their families but by and large that type of lifestyle is vanishing from the American landscape. 

So this has become family to us, the Mowdys. And what a great family it is! I know that there are times that I don't see eye to eye with each and everyone of these amazing folks. I am equally sure they question my sanity at times. But isn't that family? A group of people gathered, cut from different cloths, coming from different perspectives to make a life together. 

Our family is growing. Yesterday we had some new folks join our family. A growing family is a vital family. I may be biased but this family is exceptionally great. I feel, bias aside, there are many people outside this family that would attest to my assessment.  Many people that have moved away still claim this family. Some have left for good. We still miss them.



Dr. Phil lists Five Factors for a Phenomenal Family. I find that a vital church works on each of these points: "create a nurturing and accepting family system, promote rhythm in your family life, establish meaning rituals and traditions, be active in your communication and learn to manage crisis." This article is worth the read for anyone attempting to create a healthy family, church, workplace or even in your home.  

What have I learned about family from these folks?
1. Being messed up doesn't mean we are less effective.
We are messy, weird with such varied lifestyles. It is those varied life experiences that help us to be effective in this world. When a problem arises, someone knows the answer, whether it is to fix the church van or help an addict. Someone has the tools in their tool box to address the situation. God has masterfully brought us all through life to this point to form a strong, complete unit. Is your family using your weirdness to strengthen it?

2. Differences only make us stronger.
Scripture says iron sharpens iron. In our family, we have people that like to believe what scripture says about having faith that God will provide while others hang on the idea to be good stewards of what God provides. Holding two opposing concepts in tension is what allows us all to grow. As one strong idea rub against another strong idea a sharpness comes into focus somewhere between the two. Are you squelching the thoughts and ideas of others robbing your family of a balanced perspective? 

3. What brings us together is what is important.

In our case, a deep love for others, found in Jesus Christ, shaped by God and ignited by the holy Spirit is what gathers this family together. This is a praying family. This is a family that worships in one accord. This is a family that puts God above all else. What beings you family together besides DNA?



4. Healthy families grow love and love grows healthy families. 
This family keeps growing; in number as well as love. Sure some get mad and take their ball home. Divorce happens in every family, although often it could be avoided. But in those willing to work together, understand that no one is perfect (including yourself) and get the concept that when one person gets their way - someone else may not. But your turn may be next time and love comes from within. Love comes from God through the Holy Spirit that resides within you. Let God love you, accept that love and then share it The rest will not matter. Perfect love. which is from God, when allowed to flow will create perfect love for each other. 

Whether it is on your home, workplace or church, be weird!

Send the Elephant Packing

I would like to hit you with a concept that I call the "Poverty Elephant." To me poverty is the proverbial elephant in the room; large, looming, going nowhere, taking up space. An obvious problem or tenuous situation no one wants to tackle. The metaphorical idiom is struck in the idea that if there were an elephant in the room it couldn't be overlooked; so everyone pretends the elephant isn't in the room at all.  The "Poverty Elephant" is the desire of a person or group of people to not understand poverty for those in poverty, those in plenty and the relationship between the two. Creighton Abrams Jr.,  Former Chief of Staff of the United States Army, is credited with the saying, "When eating an elephant take one bite at a time." I don't believe I would be fond of elephant consumption. I feel it is time we reconcile with the elephant in the room; send him packing.

As a pastor of a congregation that is known for their love of people and their desire for reaching out, I often find myself mediating the conversation regarding helping those in need and helping those that are not truly in need but are in want. The backbone of this church family is a deeply, imbedded work ethic and an overall approach toward simplicity. Some folks find it hard to help those that "could" help themselves. Others say nothing but live in constant tension of what they feel they are called to do, feeling as though God will "sort this out", yet all the while hoping those receiving help truly "need" it. "The Poverty Elephant" is our lack of understanding of the relationship of poverty for God's people.

Taking a look at poverty a few concepts must be understood. 

• Poverty is not limited to those unable to provide for their needs.
• We all personally struggle with the spirit of poverty. 
• Christ said the poor will always be with us and we should take care of those that do without.
• Poverty is relative to each person's culture. 

Whether we would like to admit it or not, the concept of helping those in need is biblical. We are asked, commanded, to love others as ourselves. To not only give our shirt but our jacket as well. To pull all our resources together, use what we need and then give the rest to the poor. In the culture in which Christ delivered this kingdom code for his followers there were two words to describe the concept of poor; penes and ptochos. The term penes referred to those we would call the working class poor. Those that did not have leisure time or time to devote themselves to attending ball games, discussing or participating in politics, pursue higher education for the sake of knowledge. Ptoschos were those that had loss family, social support, so therefor became part of the "begging poor." When Jesus spoke of the poor, he was speaking of the ptochos; the begging poor. They would always be with us. And clearly we are to help beyond their requests. This issue of deservedness is never addressed. All we know is that they will be here forever and we are to help them generously.

So why do we balk at helping others when it is clear that is what we are called to do? WARNING: This is a "pot/kettle moment." Here are a few thoughts that have run through my head at least once, maybe you have had these thoughts too:

• I work hard for this money, why can't they?
• Some people take my money for needs and use their money for frivolous expenditures.
• If they would _____________ (fill in your activity of choice) they would have enough to live on. Choices can include stop smoking, stop drinking, work at McDonald's, sell their car, etc.

A shocking statement coming from this pastor is, "Yes, this is true. All of these sentiments have validity." But in addition to that I would say these statement come from a place of a spirit of poverty. It isn't so much that we feel we are poor, it is that no matter what we have been given by God, we feel that we need/deserve/want more and that by giving to those who by our estimation don't deserve it we are taking from ourselves.

As a child I learned the lesson between wants and needs. If I heard once I heard a bazillion times, "Want in one hand and s#@* in the other and see which gets fullest first." In fact I heard it so often I learned to confuse needs for wants. I learned the fine art of convincing myself that I needed something when in all actuality it was only wanted...badly...immensely. 

Everything we have we has been given by God. Most of us know and agree with this...theoretically. But because we work so hard a spirit of entitlement, "I deserve good things", because I worked hard to have them. But we earned the right to work by choosing to leave God's perfect garden to have our free will, right?

So we are left with the elephant. To eat or not to eat, that is the question. Allow me to send the elephant packing instead. Since helping the poor won't fix the problem as they will always be with us. Since we know we have issues about whether we should or who or even why we should help. Maybe, just maybe those are not the questions to be asking ourselves. Maybe there is a different answer.  Maybe the answer is that we should help. Could it be that the poor will also be with us to help us remember that we dont need all we have; that God provides what we need and that is all we need. Maybe the poor will always be with us so there will be a never ending lesson of simplicity and generosity waiting for us to learn. Possibly, we are to forever engage in poverty not so that we loose "stuff" by giving but that we "gain" God by uncluttering.  If we had no poor to share with, we wold we just keep wanting and amassing more possessions? Would they pile so high that we would lose sight of the One that gave us the ability and resources to even "have?" 

So what do we do with they elephant, we pack his trunks full of all of our over-flowing blessing from God's and send him on His way and enjoy our life with God awaiting the next elephant.

Gotta Wear Shades

What were you doing thirteen years ago, today? This is the question of the day. For those of you just emerging from your fog of comfy bed, blankets and slumber, let me remind you, today is September 11th. If that isn't enough to rouse you I will call it by the name that became the trademark of tragedy - today is the anniversary of 9-11.

So what were you doing about now 13 years ago? Most everyone can answer that question. I can. I was sitting in my office of Cumberland Mountain School, a childcare center which also served as a lab school to train people for careers in early care and education. Helping to begin Cumberland Mountain School is what brought our family to Tennessee. Previously I had worked for the Center for Early Childhood Professional Development at the University of Oklahoma; both Joe, the girls and I being Oklahoma born and bred. The day of the 9-11 tragedy I was in a new office, in a new job, reflecting on an old feeling; fear!

Sitting in the office of a child care you do not have on a television nor a radio. It is all child interaction all the time. It was the ringing of the telephone that began the delivery of the message for the day as well as the aftermath that followed on September 11, 2001. 

You see, that is what we remember. That is what we think of when asked, "Where were you that day?" We may remember the incident as a brief marker of time but our thoughts go to where we were, what we were doing and what unfolded that day. For me I remember being in my office and barely leaving due to answering the phone comforting and assuring scared parents, calling to check on my kids, myself, and preparing a re-release of an article I had written around September of 1995 following the Oklahoma City bombing. The article was about reducing and preventing stress for children during troubling times of tragedy. I had been asked to write the article because I directed the "other" federal child care center when Timothy McVey killed a total of 168 people, 15 of which were children; babies at the America's Kids DayCare. Many parents had the same thought; one day care was bombed, is someone trying to recreated what happened before and could their children be in danger. 

As the day of September 11th progressed into the evening the impact of the OKC bombing resonates through out our family. Jill has a respiratory event, often brought on by stress. Jill had spent the day of the bombing terrified because all she had been told was "The federal day care had blown up and everyone there was dead." She knew that is where her mom and sister were. Later the day of the fall of the twin towers on 9-11, Jill reported that the minute she first heard, her thoughts went to worry over me and her sister, although she couldn't figure out why. We know now she flashed bak to the stress of the the bombing day. Alli was only a little shut down. She never understood what was going on. She was only six years old but knew "something" was happening. 

Why in the world does our mind go to bad things when we look at remembering tragedy. Why do we go to the fear? Why do we not look at how God over came evil in that day? First! 

We, as believers and followers in Christ are asked to remember. As Christ for told of his painful, impending sacrifice, He sets forth a plan, a system to remember that very sacrifice. But not in tragedy but in a way that displays God overcoming evil. As United Methodists we recite this plan as we share in the act of Holy Eucharist. But God reigns supreme in the moment of intended evil through this very sentiment:
       Make them (the bread and cup) be for us the body and blood of Christ,
       that we may be for the world the body of Christ;
       redeemed by his blood.

Evil wants us to remember the pain, the fear. God wants us to remember His glory in the redemption of the moment. Evil when we when we are lost is misery. God is glorified when we lift our heads and find His light in the darkness. 

Many rose above fear on 9-11. Those that struggled to save the injured, miracle stories of those that survived against all odds to live and share messages to others. What if those in US Flight 93 has stayed in their dark, panicked moment and huddled down? It is suspected that pane was headed for the White House. Many passengers like Todd Beamer  were recorded on phone calls for help leading other passengers in the Lord's Prayer and the 23rd Psalm, then with a cry of "Let's Roll!" rushed the hijackers bringing the plane down in an empty field short of it's intended target. They lifted their heads above the fear and saw the Light of God's glory! 


Looking to today's headlines, we have cause for concern. The threat that began the terror on 9-11 has grown, not diminished. The response to unrest is most often more violence - not peace; often in the form of terrorism. So what will you do this day or days to follow? Look up to find the light beyond the darkness or bury your head and allow dark to befall you? Sir Edmond Burke said, "Those who don't now history are doomed to repeat it." But allowing history be that...His Story eradicates fear. His perfect love casts out the fear of the past and lets the light shine in the future.  The your future will be so bright... you should know the rest. 

Failure is an Option

Back in June I wrote a blog titled, "Be An Ice Cube STAT". I highlighted a a picture of an orchid my daughter Alli gave me; an orchid I thought has died. I told of how, with loving care and nurturing, my husband resurrected the near dead orchid. 

I feel now, as I did when I first wrote that blog, that we all need that loving touch sometimes and other times we may need to be the water to there arid dryness. I had the picture of a perfect, vital community sitting right on my kitchen windowsill. I love looking at each day and it gives hope for humanity; hope for our planet. Everyone helping when help is needed. We all lean on each other when we need to lean and we prop up when we prop up. Together, beauty is found. Here is the beautiful first orchid of the resurrected plant. It almost looks artificial, doesn't it? I love the delicacies of this flower. Is is transparent and fragile, yet sturdy with help.



Check this out! Here is the same plant in August. If you are having trouble counting, it holds not one, not two, not three but NINE blossoms. It still has the stick but only because it became so heavy with weight from holding up all the blooms. Beautiful! Amazing. I had to capture this picture. I felt as though God was blessing us because of our great care; our dedication. By "our" I mean Joe but what's mine is his and what is his is mine. I share in his victory. We are awesome! This is proof that if you love something, take care of it you will achieve greatness. What a glorious trophy of horticulture prowess , right in the kitchen. I pondered moving it to the living room so I could share it with everyone that came to our home. (Joe stopped me explaining the lighting was not correct in the living room.)

King Solomon is considered the author of the collection of wisdom statement in the Bible titles, Ecclesiastes. The name implies Solomon penned this wisdom so that it could be shared or taught with the gathered assembly of people.  One of the most recognized passages from this book is:

"For everything there is a season,
     and a time for every purpose under heaven.
A time to be born, and a time to die; 
     a time to plant, a time to pluck up that which is planted." Ecclesiastes 3:1-2

This is the passage that ran through my head as I watched the beautiful, bountiful flower, decrease and appear to flounder. The passage was more to calm and sooth me as I panicked thinking Joe was doing something wrong. (Yes, I noticed now it is all Joe. That is how I roll. Joe loves me anyway.) I mean really, he had to be doing something wrong. It was so full and lovely. Yes, I get flowers don't live forever, but before as one would wither and its life would end one, sometimes two would be right behind it to fill in the gap. I began to loose faith in Joe's green thumb, the light and shade in the back yard, the cleanliness of the kitchen window. Could it be so dirty that the light is filtering through insufficiently? I didn't clean, mind you, but I did wonder. I worried that we hadn't been the support the flower needed. We failed as a community. All the while I kept saying the passage over and over in my head, hoping against hope Solomon is as wise as he is given credit for. Letting it be a "season" removed the guilt of maybe doing something wrong. I would have something to tell Alli when she came hope, ran to the kitchen to see her gift withering away before her eyes. (Probably not really but I would feel bad!) What did we do wrong?!?!?!?


Nothing. It is the end of a cycle. The orchids need a break. Joe noticed they need to be moved into a larger pot. The roots are poking out in an area of the pot. It holds the  promise of blooms, new life to come in small bumps n the stem. Joe pointed out it's leaves are healthy, it's stem is bent from hard work carrying a heavy load but it is stringer than it once was. Once again this beautiful gift is providing a big lesson. Life has up moments and down moments. Life will make you tire and use you but not use you up. When you give, and give, and give you look spent and down but you are still not out. And aster some rest, life will spring forth and this time you will be stronger, wiser and better equipped to handle what life could bring. The season you are in is just fine. There will be a new season in time. 

To everything there is a season...turn, turn, turn

The Same Big Rocks

A few representatives from HUMC Liturgical Dance Camp 

What you are seeing here (see video) is a glimpse of Heaven. These close to perfect beautiful children praising the Lord with dance. What is important to not is these kiddos are not concerned with the fact that they learned the dance at classes at one denomination with kids from various denominations (and non) and are dancing in a house of worship in another. (By house of worship I mean converted movie theater!) These represent at least four different church families. 





Here is another picture of God's Kingdom. Last weekend, folks from the Homestead community in Cumberland County, Tennessee gathered to pray for the community, the teachers and faculty, and the children. Represented here are 9 churches from 4 denominations. Adults; young and older. Children; many not understanding why this moment is big. Some of the people have yet to discover a church home. But together they gathered on public school property to pray for God's reign here on this piece of real estate; praying for "Thy Kingdom to come on Earth."  As I looked with trepidation at the new local Church of Christ pastor when I stepped up to pray for the community his comment was, "We're just here, servants of God, toiling together, hitting the same big rocks."


Isn't that how it should be - the harvest is great and the workers are few and all that? In this county at least 92% of the population profess to be "Christian", yet less that 50% of the population are actively pursuing a relationship with God in community through church or some other organized house of worship; in other words they are non-church going. There is a message in a bunch of kids gathering to dance for God where ever they are allowed and bunch of people gathering to pray to stake a claim for God where He is often asked to leave. What is that message? 

"Though we cannot think alike, may we not love alike? May we not be of one heart, though we are not of one opinion? Without all doubt, we may. Herein all the children of God may unite, notwithstanding these smaller differences." ~ John Wesley

OR, in other words...

"We're just here, servants of God, toiling together, hitting the same big rocks." ~Rev. Don Anderson

We are people of one God. We are people of one book. Let us be people be of one heart so that we can be people of one Kingdom here on Earth. I pray we have the opportunity to go more places to dance. I hope for the chance to pray for others in all places. I want to go far and wide to bring workers together to toil in our vast mission field.

Why would I want to go anywhere - everywhere to toil - to work? Why? "He has forgiven our sins as far as the east is to the west." Psalm 103:12 I figure if He can forgive us that extravagantly, I should be prepared to serve God equally as extravagantly. I realize I am but one, broken person willing to serve, but if I only rely on what I can do alone then I allow no room for others to come along side me and God to supply the power. I also realize that no matter where I go to serve - there will be the same big rocks!

Eeek I Ate a Fuji

This might be a one of my favorite places in Crossville, TN. It is called Rowell's Apple House. It is located just down the road from us. Rowell's grows and hand picks every apple. They are high quality, pesticide free, crunchy, goodness. When you walk in you can taste apple in the air. I find it funny that I like this place because I really don't like apples. I have tried my whole life but they made my stomach hurt. I kept trying to like them but they were just cold, hard and sour to me. Until this!!!!

THE HONEY CRISP

Someone brought one to apple study and it was love at first bite. It is amazing!! Crispy, juicy, sweet, fragrant. Walking into buy a whole bag of these apples delights my heart. I only want to eat the Honey Crisp. All other apples are not even considered when I walk into the Apple House.I walk right past the other rows. I know the shelf on which they live and I don't visit any other apples. there are some I have never tried. They may be good by why make the gamble? I am not wiling to even try.

But then catastrophe happened. I ate a Fuji. I had purchased some Fuji's for a friend and one had accidentally ended up in my honey crisp bag. I know how it infiltrated its way into my bag. I was juggling many bags into the house and the Fuji deftly rolled out of the bag, on to the ground, where Joe scooped it up and PUT IT INTO THE WRONG BAG!!!! This morning a innocently grabbed an apple, never worrying about there being a interloper lurking in our beautiful apple basket. As I began to read, pray and study I took the first bite. Something was wrong, way wrong! 

I am being dramatic, I know. But I seriously only like Honey Crisp. But I often find myself in this predicament in other aspects in my life. I like what I like. I am fairly open minded. I am willing to try new tastes, experiences or adventures, but I am quick to put everything into a "keep" or "toss" basket. Stuff in my "toss" basket: tennis, seafood, bike riding, polka, patten leather shoes and horror movies. There is really no plans of trying them again. They have no chance of making my "keep" basket. 

I ponder...does God have a "keep" and "toss" basket? Does He look at His creation and think, "Nope, i tried working with the Monica girl but, naw, she just isn't what I a looking for." Toss! Would He gaze at a church meeting, bible study or gathering of His followers and say to Himself, "I keep hoping these experience get more satisfying but it's not happening. See ya!" I doubt it. 

Fortunately, our God is a God of grace; a God of mercy. Unfortunately, I believe He has a deep understanding of where and how we fall short. He loves us, accepts us and stays with us anyway. Whew! Good thing because often our actions, who we have become is a poor representation of what God created.  God doesn't appear to have a toss or keep basket. It appears as though He holds out hope that we will transform into the original intent. 

I wonder what He thinks about what we manifest into this world with our choices of how we accept others? Does He shake is head in discouragement as we place people in the toss or keep basket. Maybe we should just be willing to occasionally accept a Fuji, or Red Delicious, or even Granny Smith into your life? 

"Therefor accept each other just as Christ as accepted you so that God will be given glory." Romans 15:7

Thing 1, Thing Who?

I have always been a cool kid, from the very, very beginning. This is me just shy of age 2. Not sure the story here but, honestly, there may not have been one. I was "that" kid. You know, the kid that sits on couch with one slipper missing, pants too short and a Thing 1 wig on my head. Just sayin... Who would know by the time this picture had been taken I had been born with multiple health problems 2 moths early, was living with my grandparents after they had taken me from and abusive father and a mother incapable of stopping it and my grandfather had passed away suddenly so the home I lived in was enveloped with grief. I apparently was oblivious by the looks of this photo, fair enough - I was barely a toddler. 

This was just the beginning. Abuse, neglect and multiple homes and fathers followed. Many would say I experienced many tragedies in my childhood. 

BUT

Many riches occurred during my childhood. I was blessed to have a grandmother that indulged me as grandmothers should. She was known for saying, you can't spoil a smart child. My mother's sister and her husband, Aunt Judy and Uncle Terry, provided summer get-aways and a picture of a "normal" home life with two parents, discipline, routine and love. I learned what could be.

As an adult the trend has continued. Some really crazy, less than favorable moments coupled with some really great times that have shaped my life. 

SO

Am I wrecked for life? Have these horrible moments decimated me? Apparently not. I am here. I have survived. I feel as though I have thrived in many areas of my life. And convexly, there have been failures. I feel as though I was refined by the fires in my life. There are scars, flaws in the product called "ME" but I find comfort in the fact that there is a product and a useable/functional one at that. I almost feel as though the flaws serve as a way to make me more unique, more uncommon, me "Monica." I begin looking like everyone else, then BAM out comes the Thing 1 wig! I find that the scars on my heart, my soul serve to make for strength. As the wound would heal (and it will if I don't keep picking at it) the tough skin that forms making a scar gives strength to my heart allowing it to continue on, pumping, loving, breaking for others but as more stabs come my heart is stronger more resilient due to the very scars formed by the very wounds that intended as fatal. I have always pondered how is this type of perseverance possible? 

THEN

This sign posted by my friend Tracy at Perks, her coffee shop. This is it. Not only have the fires in my life been unsuccessful in consuming me, reducing me to ashes. The fire has created me. Built me. Scorch marks and all. This fire is proof of God's grace and mercy. God does not allow us to be consumed, destroyed, removed from His sight. But takes the same fire and uses it to heat us up, strengthen us and make us gold; more precious and valuable. The prophet Isaiah spoke of God's intentions for His created. The writer of Romans says, "God is a consuming fire." What God does with those flames of His, is he consumed those "fleshly bits" that stand in our way from perfection. He takes that glowing red ember and cauterizes the flowing wounds of abuse and self-inflection. The intense heat solders the places of weakness in our character and makes them stronger. 

NOW

Let it happen. Let the fire burn. Let God's flames create in you a clean heart, a strong countenance, and an unstoppable force while on this planet!

Be Where it Matters

Recently I was blessed to participate in a wedding of a couple from our church family. Participation for me means I enter into a covenant of guidance, love and commitment before the actual ceremony. I love the pre-wedding stuff! I have to admit, by the time bride and groom are in the church, standing before me, at the altar of God ready to make covenantal vows with God to spend their life in a triangulated relationship with God.

This wedding was not unique by today's standards but definitely not one with a nice standard liturgy in the United Methodist Book of Worship; there were children from a previous marriage and from this relationship that were entering into this covenant as well as to create a new family unit.

Elle as my Associate Pastor

I often wonder why our liturgies of the church haven't begun to wrestle with and embrace the shapes of families today and take on the task of updating our liturgical voice to fit. But this is a post for another day. On this day I want to share my thoughts about this:

This photo has lingered in my head long past the day the couple is to return from their beach bound honeymoon. There is something special about this picture. I am a firm believer that if you want a perfectly, well-choreographed wedding do not ask children to be involved. But if you want a wedding that is a representation of who you are, your loves and your passions, then you may end up with unpredictability. And this wedding wins.

At first glance you may think that this little girl either just really likes me or loves being the focus of attention but let me assure you, neither is true. She is what I love to call a "touch me not." She is unsure around many people other than her immediate family. She is slow to warm up to new people and even after a year she has yet to warm up to me and she retreats if she thinks others are watching. So why did she choose to stand next to me after dumping her bucket of petals in one solid lump at the feet of the bridesmaids? I think the answer is in her posture. I think we may see a hint of what her curly little head is thinking when you look at her placement. Her temperament is mirroring not the celebration as much as it is the seriousness of the moment.

This beautiful three-year-old little cherub is standing at attention; with pride and importance. She is standing as a facilitator for God and her parents. She appears to grasp exactly why we are here.

To compensate for the short-coming of standard liturgy, I often write in vows for the adults as parents in the new family and ask the children to respond. Elle took this time quite earnestly and then walked up and took her place with beside me, both at rehearsal and the ceremony. She stood there, uncharacteristically still sans wiggles and gazed upon her parents as they vowed to love each other and promise to create a family that would be a glory to God. She seemed to want to be where the "action" was happening; the place where God was in the midst of the moment. 


Why wouldn't you rather be where God is in the mix instead of on the side lines standing in uncomfortable shoes waiting to make a dash to the reception? Why wouldn't you want to be up where the "action" is taking place? She had a ring side seat to the formation of a new family in the sight of God!

God was at work at that moment. An unsuspecting bride and groom where standing in God's presence and He blessed this family in this moment! What an amazing process to witness up front and personally. How often are we willing to stand where we have been told or relegate ourselves to the furthest spot from God to because convention dictates? Maybe we need to learn to put ourselves in the midst of God's action. Do we miss the magnitude of a moment by getting lost in the duty of the day? 

Let little Elle teach us to make our way to where God is at work, stand and watch what He does in the moment and be ready for what comes our way!

I Am Being Disciplined!

"The reports of my death has been greatly exaggerated!" ~ Mark Twain

Truthfully I haven't heard anyone wondering if I have died but I have had many ask me if I quit blogging. Nope - didn't quit. I did, however, lose the discipline I had developed to blog each day; to hone my writing skills. What went wrong? Nothing wrong per se. Actually you could say somethings went right, school started and got two boys back in the classroom and out from underfoot, mainly. What threw me off the discipline train was a few bumps in the road; morning schedule change, some ministry matter and the return of meetings. All of these situations combine to make a big ball of excuses; not reasons. I really just needed to readjust each day to make time.

Why is blogging so important that I need to put it my daily priorities? I feel as though God is urging me to write; some thoughts, maybe a book. But I know that the big things begin with small disciplines.

Job would have never endured the hardships, his bumps in the road, had he not first developed a habit of glorifying God with his daily practices of piety? Moses spent daily time with God as he led God's chosen through the wilderness. God wants me to do what He wants me to do. I can't just skip that time because the time passes or the schedule changes. But I did; I do. 

Am I called then to throw in the towel, give up, chalk it up as another failure and wait until God tries to call me into something else? Oddly enough, that would be what I would usually do and more than likely I would. 

Why not this time? God won't let me off the hook on this one. so here I am back at it. If you read something that speaks to you, share it, comment below. Help me to continue to hone this skill, this calling God has laid upon me. 

God calls us all to spiritual disciplines; those things we do with disciplined regularity growing in God's grace as we give our life to God with intention. As we grow in discipline into those places God calls we we grow deeper roots which strengthen our tree of faith in God and His provision. 

What is God calling you to do as practice? Are you answering the call?

Are you disciplined in your practice?

Spiritual disciplines can range from study, fasting, prayer, visitation, reading scripture, chastity... you get the picture, those areas in our life God wants that we keep to ourselves. For me it is articulating God's truth shaping my life becoming my truth. 

What will it be for you?