From the Edge of the Pond - General Conferece Decisions Making

I have been asked by concerned members of my congregation to speak to what is happening at General Conference; some just interested, some worried about a schism and others with a vested interest in the LQBTQI issue on both sides of the argument.

Where I am from there is a saying, “Its hard to know what to do when you are standing in the middle of the pond with alligators nipping at your butt” meaning that it is easier to spot the problem when you are standing on the outside looking in. 

So here I am…standing on the outside looking in. I am not, nor desire to be a delegate to General Conference and I am a single pastor at a medium sized church that is richly invested in Kingdom work which is a pastoral way of saying I am too busy to hang on every moment of the live stream. I have enjoyed many of the worship services. I wanted to watch Bishop William McAlilly, my bishop, preside over the plenary session on Wednesday afternoon but that is when we have worship dance at church...busy. 

After seeing the comments later on social media about how Bishop McAlilly was treated and how the session went following council of bishops resolution and Adam Hamilton’s motion concerning that resolution I searched for more actual video footage but could find none. So I waited until later to watch the archived video of the live stream. Sigh, I went to the edge of the pond. Unlike many, I was not outraged that Bishop McAlilly was accused of “telegraphing votes with his hands.” In fact, I rewound and watched the entire clip focusing on his hands. I found it humorous that the telegraphing accusation was launched at all; a preaching Bishop that does what so many of us do, talk with his hands, is what I saw. I did see some fidgeting with his ink pen. Fidgeting born of being forced to sit still in front of many folks, guiding them in a movement toward God’s will.  Many of these folks did not appear to be seeking a consensus but more looking to have a decision made in accordance with their desire. While it is an attack on his personal integrity that he would do such a thing as telegraph votes, it more ludicrous that someone actually thought he had. I dare any preacher or speaker to sit up there and not wave a hand or two.

Later in the session when Bishop McAlilly was asked to step down due to the bias he was projecting. I was not angry but perplexed. Once again, I rewound the clip to that portion only to find a man, humbly navigating a stilted process through a sea of high passion. Some say it was his race (caucasian), some say it was his gender (male) and some say it was his tell-tale accent, (he is a Mississippi man) that tipped people off to his bias. I fear it was the cloudy glasses through which he was viewed that gave the opinion of bias. Yes, here in the South we have people that are hopefully awaiting a vote in the favor of LGBTQI individuals and some of them are white males. Many of them as well as those not hoping for said outcome felt our Bishop was unfairly labeled. 

But standing on the edge of the pond, watching from the sidelines, what I mostly saw; clearly viewing from my comfortable seat on the couch was a desire by commenters to reach their individual desires, no matter the cost. Even if it meant for a Bishop to be asked to step down for the first time since the 1800s.

Almost every point of order, question or motion was rooted in being done! Finished! Winning! I love doneness. I am a fan of a clear, direct path towards a specific destination. By nature I am not a wanderer allowing my path be decided by any outside force. I am not prone to delight in process but love to celebrate in the finished product. But my limited understanding of God is that God is a God of journeys. How many times in scripture has God’s people been set on a course of movement, yet given ample time to wander. The wandering is a learning and shaping time. Yes, we have been wandering on the sexuality issue for a number of years; since 2004 as a formal conversation at General Conference. A mere 12 years; but a long time for those waiting, worrying and hurting. I get it. I have friends and loved ones hurt by the slowness of the church and its people over this very issue.

What I see in  people pushing to decide, to vote immediately remind me of the wanderers in the desert when Moses was on the mountain.

   "Ok, Moses. We will follow you. Guide us. We know you hear from God." 

     But then...

    “We want ‘it’ now, Aaron. We need a god. Build us a calf. Quick here’s my bracelet.” 

We asked those chosen, anointed and called to lead, Bishops to do that... guide and lead. They did. They are asking for time to hear, discern. We will still be moving. Just the specific destination is unseen and in the distance. From my sideline point of view, the simple answer I see is to keep moving forward, in discourse and discernment. Yes, people will still be worrying, waiting and possibly even hurting while we wander. But we will not be wandering without purpose. All the while we wander we will be headed toward God’s Promise for us as the Church; Christ’s Church and what a powerful witness that will be.

NOTE:

“The Council of Bishops asked General Conference to delay a debate on homosexuality at this gathering of the denomination’s top legislative assembly until a proposed commission can study church regulations. Instead, the bishops asked for the body’s permission to name a special commission that would completely examine and possibly recommend revisions of every paragraph in The Book of Discipline related to human sexuality. The commission would represent the different regions of a denomination on four continents as well as the varied perspectives of the church.”

The archived plenary session referenced:

https://youtu.be/DV0cCNy5y1Y

The Council of Bishop's recommendation for hold on sexuality debate :

http://s3.amazonaws.com/Website_Properties/general-conference/2016/dca/gc2016-daily-christian-advocate-051916.pdf

A UMReporter Podcast Recap:

http://unitedmethodistreporter.com/2016/05/19/umreporter-roundtable-episode-008-5182016/

Snowy Worship at Home 1-24-16

What do you do when we cancel church? Well Amelia gave me inspiration. You worship at home together.  Her is how she worships. She danes ALL the big girl dances for Micah and Jill.

Surely we can do as well or better than a two year old.

Follow the links below and enjoy Homestead Worship

Welcome and Instructions

Music of Praise

Enjoy!

Please listen to the words as you enjoy the dancers

Sr. Dancers Come as You Are

The Word and Message

Relationships with "The Other"

Let Us Pray

Closing Music

If We Are the Body

Pure Praise

5 Practical Fasting Tips This Season

Fasting is expected of Christians. Christ said..."when you fast...", not if. But fasting a an opportunity to be humble in the presence of God, intensify your prayer life, and hopefully receive guidance from God. The hardest part of fasting is the discipline of fasting, especially during holiday seasons. Our Bishop, William McAllilly, has asked us to pray and fast during Advent and beyond leading up to Jurisdictional and Annual Conference. Being the practical sort I thought it might be helpful to offer 5 Practical Fasting Tips!

1. To fend off morning hunger clean out your sink after one of your teen age boys dumped his partially eaten, CocoaPebbles and milk in the stock pot you left soaking. You will not be hungry at all, trust me. And pray offering God your obedience. 









2. Drink copious amounts of water. Water will fill your belly and keep you from feeling hungry. Also, the increased trips to the restroom will keep you busy and your mind off of food. And pray thanking God for two good legs to make all of those trips.











3. Don't keep snacks in your desk drawer. Trust me...just don't. And pray asking God for strength in your journey.  






4. Make a point to NOT visit that one friend that always eats flavorful foods and then has issues with respecting your personal space. Smelling garlic on their breath can be tough. And pray asking God for solace.

5. Buy an English Bulldog. English Bulldogs insist on being walked...A LOT. They are also high targets for theft so you can't just let them outside. Bulldogs are also smart. They will trick you into thinking they need to go. So out you go. You will be tied up all day with your dog. Thank God that your life allows you to have pets, and that you can feed them and yourself when so many others can't. 

Seriously, fasting is never easy. It isn't supposed to be. But with God you will be able to fast. That is the point; reliance on God, obedience to God and submission to God.  

Disclaimer: All of these tips are silly except for the praying tips. They may or may not be actual circumstances in my fasting life. Happy Advent. #dohardthings 

The Terror of Division

Yesterday I wrote a post on Facebook regarding my feelings about the latest college shooting. As a rule I keep my posts light. I am not certain that social media is a place to try to be a change agent. So I post pictures of AnnaBelle. I mean really, who doesn’t love a great picture of a cleft lip bulldog puppy. 

But I felt as though I needed to say something in reference to yet another mass murder in our country. So I posted this:

But following is what I really wanted to say. It was buried so deeply within my heart that I could’t get the words to bubble up to my fingers and type them into my blog. But I feel as though in an effort to move forward I need to extract these words.

April 19th marked the 20th anniversary of the Oklahoma City bombing; the largest act of terrorism on American soil by an American. On that day I realized something profound but I didn’t have a voice to speak my heart. 

Four years later, in a suburb of Denver Colorado the first act of terrorism in a school that made national headlines happened at Columbine High School. Twelve student were murdered. I consider this an act of terrorism because as I place myself inside that school I am certain I feel terror.

Since those two turning points in American history we have had a plethora of terrorism hit America. Most of which has been perpetrated by other Americans. Not just guns were used to kill. Let be clear, I don’t love guns personally. The power of a firearm frightens me and I have no desire to carry a gun but I have a son that hunts, shoots on a pistol and trap shooting team and sees a future in law enforcement. I am thankful he is responsible with a firearm. Bombs have not been the favored choice of murder nor has airplanes colliding into buildings.

The biggest weapon utilized in terrorism is a divisive spirit; you against me, them against us, I am right and you are wrong. When extreme sides are formed on any issue the wall built obstructs any opportunity for discourse. In Proverbs 18:13 we read, “He who answers before listening – that is his folly and his shame.” Earlier in this same chapter there is a pointed evaluation of those who would rather talk than listen: “A fool finds no pleasure in understanding but delights in airing his own opinions” (18:2). In the New Testament, James 1:19 says “Let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, and slow to anger:” St Francis of Assisi stated “grant that I may not so much seek to be consoled, as to console; to be understood, as to understand.” 

Mental health issues not with standing, most conflicts can be resolved with conversation. Unfortunately today even within my own clergy/religious ranks I see far too many lines drawn in the sand. What we are saying to the unbelieving word is, “We can’t agree on what God calls us to do and who to be, so clearly we are not qualified to impart any reliable wisdom for you.” What the “Other Believing” world (other religions) see in our broken discourse is that we have no idea of what the Truth is from Our Creator. I can't even imagine what those who have lost hope in Faith see in our actions toward each other. 

I remember a time when my mother didn’t like the current president. I only know this because she told me who she voted for and why. But when, at the brilliant age of 17, I bashed the winner, Jimmy Carter, my mother immediate stopped me and explained that President Carter was elected by a fair vote of the people and as the elected president he deserved my respect. If I was truly unhappy I should vote accordingly in the next election when I was of age.  I learned something that day. My mom taught me that unity is more important that being “right.” That respect is a gift we give and gifts aren't earned. She taught me that learning about both sides of any issue or electoral candidate helped me understand decisions and processes. It also helped me tolerate life when it didn’t go my way.

What I have watched happen in our country in politics, religion, industry and even relationships is that we humans are more vested in being right that we are in being righteous. We are not at all interested in working together and understanding others unless the other is just like us unthinking and otherwise. We waste no time in learning all sides about an issue or even learning the truth of an issue. We are quick to "re-post" anything that we read that confirms our position, truthful or not. Even talk show psychiatrist, Dr. Phil knows, "no matter how thin you make a pancake, there are still two sides."

When we no longer see similarities on others we place them in a category that no longer matters to us. When lives no longer matter, we can bully, hate, revile, and yes, even kill those that no longer matter.

I don’t like everybody and don’t agree with many but I try my best to see all sides and love even those that make no sense to me. I don’t reduce others to labels or categories. But I can’t do it on my own. I am limited by my humanity to love others, to see other positions or beliefs. But I know this, I don’t have to be divided from those in which I don’t agree with. God can and will fill the gap. Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 teaches us that two are better than one. There are strength in unity and the cord is most strong when the Divine Third strand is woven within. Unity is the only thing that can bridge the divisive sprit of terror. 

Designed for the Garden

"Man was made for the garden." This is a phrase that has stuck with me for days. I can't get it out of my head since I first read it in my morning devotional from my iPhone Bible app. While pulled away from the whole text of the article it paints a nice picture of a man, tilling straight rows to sow seeds for the vegetables his wife will can in Ball jars to line their pantry for winter eating.

What the author, R.C. Sproul,  meant was that the original design of mankind was created to live in THE Garden; the perfect garden with no stress, strife or hard labor. He purports that our DNA lends us to reliance on a larger, supreme being for sustenance. Immediately, my mind wandered to this scenario; a beautiful manicured lawn, with lush vegetation, and of course  soaking tub in the midst of the gloriousness. I know the tub is not biblical, but really, Adam and Eve HAD to bathe and who knows, it might have been in the plans.

More than likely the garden would have been more like this... beautiful, lush, no bath tube and lots of critters running around. My desire for a bathtub in the midst of God's perfection is an indication of where mankind goes wrong. We always want to improve on what God offers but we want God to pony up the improvements. God was going to give us all we needed, right at our fingertips. BAM - our first home improvement, another menu item on the already overflowing buffet. 

We wanted individual dwellings, fences, modes of transportation, chemically modified enhancement of items found in nature. Yet we want God to perfect these changes and fix us when we break down due to our cravings. Why can't we be satisfied with what god gives us? Why do we want more and more and even more?

Which came first the chicken or the egg? We are taught that mankind is depraved due to the Fall but there had to be a level of depravity in Adam and Eve's make-up to desire to have more than God was already offering. Right? 

What I wonder most (and have absolutely no answers) is could it be that while we want what we want and many of us are even willing to work hard to have "things" God's true intent has been for us to only take what we get all along. Let me give you a more down-to-earth real life sized example. Every time we drive by this car

he says "Hashtag, first car." And I reply, "Hashtag, dream on." Why? Because, even if we could afford it,  (or more importantly, he worked hard to get it) he is still a sixteen year old driver and it would be expensive to insure, and dangerous for him to have that fast of car. We now that so we will say, "no." But we are much more micro managing that God. He allows our free will to obtain that which we think we need if we find a way to get it. The question is, is it the Garden He wired us for? How often do we miss the entrance to the Garden because we are busy hunting for and improved version. 

I guess I need to get more acquainted with God's Garden plan for me. I need to set my sights higher. Not to a bigger dream or a bigger goal but to a Higher Power, One who will give me what it best. 

What Do I See?

The title of this blog is, "What I See...".  The title speaks to my penchant for people watching and how they interact with others and life. Often my grandprincess, Sassy, is used as an example to illustrate "what I see" in myself and/or others but I have used other members of my family or various plants, animals, etc. No one and nothing is safe!

What I see in the world challenges me. Glimpses of life challenge me to think about what I see, what I know and what I believe. What I see in the world today is glimpses of many people listening to others...many others...speaking,  some loudly, some with charm, others with rebellious passion. But as I peer, like a voyeur, into these provocative platitudes, I don't perceive challenge; thoughts to stimulate the hearer to think, ponder, wonder and grow, sifting through the words and ideas to see what is illuminating to the hearer. What I see is more of a a sorting; "I like this", I don't like hearing this". "These thoughts feel better."

What I see isn't necessarily the truth. That is why I wrestle with the thoughts, concepts and ideas in hopes I will, through prayerful discernment and scriptural understanding, eventually hit the mark of God's truth. But by shear definition, a blog is my opinion, not fact. 

What I see is:

• People moving farther apart than working to come together. Divisive spirits control our thoughts. The desire to be right is more important that coming to a productive agreement that could move us forward. Division holds us back.

• People trying to color the world back or white. While I am not speaking of race, unfortunately, recent issues in the world have fallen in that particular arena. All police officers are not filled with fear and hate for every black person and not all people of color (any color includung white) are innocent. Life and the character of people is not black or white.
  
  
  

• That we like listening to the voices that confirm what we believe rather than the voices of those that challenge what we think. Politicians, pastors, friends that are "yes men" or play into our fears repeat the same pre-conceived notion we have already been telling ourselves. 

• Bad behavior or mean spiritedness is tolerated in the guise of humor. "We were just teasing." Hard messages need to be served with love, not hidden within sarcastic humor in the name of satire. Making poor choices should not be written off as, "It was all in fun." Because often the consequences fall on other innocent bystanders.

• We hold everyone to our standard instead of looking how we can live up to God's standard. We forget the whole log/speck part Jesus said. In doing so we make assumptions about people that may or may not be true.

• What we think has become our god and then God is shoved into that mold. This is backwards thinking. The Lord should be our God and He should be allowed to form our thoughts. I wonder what would happen if we actually, REALLY, bounced our opinions off of Scripture. (see Sermon on the Mount)

These are just a few of the thoughts I see. Many of them I see in me. Are they in you as well. Look and see. 

Stuf to Ponder

In June of this year a divided Supreme Court in a 5-4 decision ruled that same-sex couples can marry nationwide, establishing a new civil right in America.

Within days the questions came in to my office:

“When are you performing your first same-sex marriage?”

“Will you leave ministry when they force you to perform a same-sex marriage?”

“Didn’t United Methodists already marry gays?”

My answers:

“I can’t.”

“I will have to pray that through. A calling can’t just be tossed aside.”

“No! Uh, well not really supposed to. But I know it has happened. But well, they weren’t supposed to.”

It has happened.

Rev. Frank Schaefer performed the marriage of his son to his same-sex partner in a quiet, private little ceremony in 2007 in Eastern Pennsylvania. When the marriage was found out in 2013 Rev. Schaefer was defrocked, then reinstated on the promise of not performing any more same-sex marriages. He performed the marriage because he couldn't bear to live with his son’s feeling of “going to hell” because he was in love. His heart was breaking for his child. See news story: 

http://www.umc.org/news-and-media/special-coverage-frank-schaefer 

In the Spring, a 

Nashville pastor from Belmont United Methodist Church, performed a marriage of two long time members of the church she served. She notified her District Superintendent prior to the wedding. Ultimately she received a suspension of 90 days. The couple had been together in her church for 15 years. As their pastor she felt she was called to care for them and their union.

See news story: http://tinyurl.com/o284qwy

Like so many other communities of faith, the United Methodist denomination is struggling to love  and affirm as we are called, yet try to continually understand God’s will for our lives.

This article is an effort to share what United Methodists as a denomination currently state in their polity on the subject of homosexuality and transgender. I feel an understanding of the process of will be helpful in the days to come leading up to the Annual Conference in 2016 where UMs from around the world will gather to have conversations about how to proceed in a way that can help support, love and sustain all people yet maintain the sanctity of Christian teachings and what all of those lofty goals really mean for us.

What the UMC states in the Book of Discipline:

Paragraph 4:

All persons are of sacred worth and shall shall be eligible to attend its worship services, participate in its programs, receive the sacraments, upon baptism be admitted as baptized members, and upon taking vows declaring the Christian faith, regardless of race, color, national origin, status or economic condition or sexual orientation. (paraphrased)

Paragraph 214:

All people may attend its worship services, participate in its programs, receive the sacraments and become members in any local church in the connection. (paraphrased)

Paragraph 304.3

While persons set apart by the Church for ordained ministry are subject to all the frailties of the human condition and the pressures of society, they are required to maintain the highest standards of holy living in the world. The practice of homosexuality is incompatible with Christian teaching. Therefore self-avowed practicing homosexuals are not to be certified as candidates, ordained as ministers, or appointed to serve in The United Methodist Church.2

"Self-avowed practicing homosexual" is understood to mean that a person openly acknowledges to a bishop, district superintendent, district committee of ordained ministry, board of ordained ministry, or clergy session that the person is a practicing homosexual. 

Paragraph 613 & Paragraph 806.9

United Methodist funds may not go to any gay or Lesbian caucus or group. This does not limit the church’s response the the HIV epidemic. (paraphrased)

Paragraph 2702

Performing marriage of same sex unions is considered a chargeable offense.

What is a “Chargeable Offense”?

A chargeable offense is an act performed by clergy or laity that is not in keeping with Christian teaching as defined within the United Methodist Book of Discipline.

The term “chargeable offense” sounds scary. If it is so scary how did Rev. Schaefer and Rev. Hawkins receive what appear to be light sentences? The process requires for a complaint to be filed. In the case of Hawkins, after she informed her District Superintendent her intention to perform the wedding for two men in her congregation, the DS told her that a complaint would be filed and was filed following the ceremony. Once a complaint is filed a committee has 90 (which can be extended another 30 days) to act. A judiciary committee, the offender and a mediator gather to draft a resolution. The Bishop can or refuse to sign off on the resolution. If the Bishop does not sign off on the agreement then the situation goes to judiciary court. (Such was the case of Frank Schaefer)

The good news about the ruling in Rev. Pam Hawkins case is that no one seems happy with the ruling which means no one got their way. So good news - no one wins. But the bad news is no one won but everyone looses. The denomination looses, Christians everywhere loose, we loose. Whenever the church, any church, garners negative attention for fighting within their own family the witness we give the unbelieving world is more than off putting, it is a deterrent to the Good News we are called to share. How can we be clear about our message to the world when we don’t even agree on the message.

As far as weddings go it is important to note, as a pastor, I do not HAVE to do ANY wedding, for ANYONE, EVER. In the course of 11 years in ministry I have refused to officiate a wedding twice before, neither were gay or lesbian but they were straight and in my opinion not quite ready for marriage. Both went elsewhere, both are divorced.

I am currently not allowed to perform a marriage to same sex partners with out undergoing chargeable offense proceedings. When ordained I agreed to uphold the Book of Discipline. I look at this situation as following my employers policies. I will not knowingly violate the rules on marriage, or any rule for that matter. I feel that breaking a rule is not the way to change a rule.

A note on chargeable offenses for clergy, they also include: 

Immorality, including, but not limited to celibacy in singleness and extra marital affairs.

Self-avowed homosexuality or conducting marriage ceremonies for homosexual couples.

Crime (any)

Disobedience to the UM Church 

Discrimination

Dissemination of doctrines contrary to the UMC (this could include prohibiting people from the sacraments, rebaptizing individuals, etc.)

Undermining another pastor’s ministry

Child Abuse, Sexual Abuse

Harrasement

As professing members of the UMC, you could be charged with an offense for ALL the above excluding performing marriages and prohibiting sacraments.

I share this as a call for us to “log removal.” Before a judgement is passed on the sentences in cases against clergy in the issue of marriage for one’s own son or years long members in your congregation we must first look at where we have failed the church and gotten away (or are still getting away) with it. We need to remove the log in our own eye before we point out specks in other’s eyes. 

As professing members of the United Methodist church we have vowed to uphold the church with our prayers, our presence, our gifts, our service, and our witness. Before we can pass judgement on anyone we must first ask ourselves: do we pray for our church? Do we attend church regularly? Not just worship but Sunday school, Bible studies, missional endeavors, outreach? Do we share generously the gifts God has given us both monetary and spiritual? Do we serve our church and others? Do we serve with sacrifice or only in ways that feed us? Is the witness of our lives lived in such a way that we draw people to church or push them out, away from coming along side of the body of Christ?

The only answer is to first seek to understand before we seek to be understood. There are hard questions with an even harder path to answers. Answers that are in the realms of Heaven and not answered in the court of the land. 

If you would like to talk, vent or ask questions, my door is open.