"There have been men before...who got so interested in proving the existence of God that they came to care nothing for God himself...as if the good Lord has nothing to do but to exist. There have been some who were so occupied with spreading Christianity that they never gave a thought to Christ." C.S. Lewis, The Great Divorce
Life group question of the day, "What is the condition of your heart?" My heart? My heart is broken. Broken, for friends who walked away from The General Conference of the United Methodist church feeling unwanted, unloved and defeated. But my true heartbreak comes from the place inside me that is still a little girl; a little girl that just watched her parents' disagreement turn into a full blown argument. I watched, broken as my parents disagreement turned ugly and eventually resulted into what appears to be a divorce, or at least a separation.
The church is my extended family. Spiritually I was born into the UMC following a lifetime of wandering lost. With the absence of stable, extended family, as an adult, the church became for me the people that supported me, raised me and now I am a leader in the church. Like a child I look up to my family. But today my family is broken and hurting and I am certain we grieved God in the process.
I also feel that in right-fighting, we eclipsed the Word of God for ourselves, for others, and ended up doing exactly what we as people called Methodist are to not do - we are to first Do no harm. But harm was done. Harm was done to some of our own family and to our witness to the world.
"No natural feelings are high or low, holy or unholy, in themselves. They are all holy when God's hand is on the rein. They all go bad when they set up on their own and make themselves into false gods." C.S. Lewis, The Great Divorce
What can we do now? We can turn to God and and let God be God. Derive our power from the Spirit of God, and begin to pick up the pieces of our hearts and begin to heal. We can wrap our arms around those who have been hurt and finding our won healing in being a comfort to others.
"There is but one good; this is God. Everything else is good when it looks to Him and bad when it turns from Him." C.S. Lewis, The Great Divorce
Be sure to know, God doesn't need an interpreter. God doesn't need a defender. What God needs is people who show the nature of God to others in the world. God is love. Showing god's nature means to show love; love that is not drowned out by the sound of the clanging cymbal of self-righteousness.
I am no longer my own, but thine.
Put me to what thou wilt, rank me with whom thou wilt.
Put me to doing, put me to suffering.
Let me employed for thee or laid aside for thee.
Let me be full, let me empty.
Let me have all things, let me have nothing.
I freely and heartily yield all things to thy pleasure and disposal.
And now, O glorious and blessed God, Father Son and Holy Spirit,
thou art mine, and I am thine
So be it.
And the covenant which I have made on earth,
let it be ratified in Heaven.
Amen
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